One Size Does NOT Fit All : Finding the Size of the Problem

shoes

Baby New Year has arrived!  The season of parties and changed schedules is coming to its end.  Back to the ‘normal’ routine! But what about those resolutions? The promises you make to yourself that come with the fine print that reads, “I maintain the option to not follow through with these resolutions because while I mean well, life truly gets in the way.”

A close friend shared her New Year’s resolution; she was NOT going to ‘sweat the small stuff’. My response was true to the bestie code: ‘Great idea!  That’ll really make a difference! I support you!’ And when we parted ways, I got to thinking how as adults we want our children to know and recognize the difference between small, medium, and large problems however lose sight of those as we become adults.

Sometimes we need to step back and take an inventory of how we categorize problems or issues.  While the resources I am using are predominately for children, it may be worth the extra 3 minutes to read through the rest of this post to reset your personal inventory and help your loved one manage his/hers.

Small Problems:

  • Affects 1-2 people
  • No one was physically hurt
  • Feelings were minimally hurt
  • Takes 5 – 15 min to ‘fix’
  • Problem can be solved by the individual OR can be ignored completely

Medium Sized Problems:

  • Affects 3-5 people
  • May be a small physical injury
  • Feelings were hurt, person/people upset
  • May take 15 min to a couple of hours to ‘fix’
  • Problem may need another adult to be solved

Large Sized Problems:

  • Affects 6 or more people
  • May be a significant physical injury
  • No easy or quick solution to ‘fix’ hurt feelings
  • May take days to weeks to ‘fix’
  • Assistance of other adults is required to solve the issue.

While these are definitely oversimplified for some of life’s problems, they do provide a pause when thinking of day to day situations.  Food for thought to start the New Year.

Yours in Speech,

Lakeshore Speech Therapy, LLC.

Boxing Day!

empty-cardboard-boxes-

Here’s to the success and survival of the big day!  Given the millions of new toys that may now ‘live’ in your home, nothing is quite as exciting for some children as the boxes that once housed those toys. Why is that a thing? Generation after generation have been stymied by the same question.

Who are we to question? Turn those hours of climbing in boxes into therapy opportunities.

Large or small, playing with boxes, or any toys, is a wonderful way to practice shared attention, turn taking, and sharing. These exchanges, for a moment or a while, are so important to developing conversation skills, play skills, and social skills.

Large boxes – let the creativity go wild. Large boxes are ideal for creating a playhouse, cave, tent, or castle. Add a few blankets and pillows and a flashlight and you have the makings of hours of imaginative play.  Not only are these great vessels to take imaginations to the outer limits, these are wonderful oases of quiet. The language opportunities are never ending. Every empty box needs decorations. A few crayons and stickers and a masterpiece is born. Requesting crayon colors or stickers or continuation of the activity are all ways to get a little language practice in with no one being the wiser.

Medium boxes aren’t just for sweaters or shirts anymore. Line the floor with opened boxes and create games of moving in and out of the boxes – lily pad jumping, indoor hopscotch.  These games can incorporate vocabulary and language concepts of in, out, go, stop, more, waiting for your turn, etc. All important skills for developing and practicing language.

Small boxes – the gems of the box family. Tape these closed and use as building blocks – great for individuals with dexterity issues. Build box towers. Up, on top, bottom, more, help, crash, boom, uh-oh – vocabulary and language concepts waiting to be part of the tower construction.  

Once the boxes lose their charm, it’s off to the recycling bin! However,  the opportunity to practice language and social skills will never lose its charm!

Yours in Speech,

Lakeshore Speech Therapy, LLC.

Simple Holiday Social Skills Practice for Families

christmas

It’s the final countdown until the big day (cue Europe’s 1986 hit song)! The lists have been checked twice, the stockings are hung by the chimney with care, and all that’s left is the wait… the long wait until we can rip open those gifts!

And when those gifts are torn into, we wait with bated breath, hoping our loved ones not only enjoy the presents, but also remember to say “Thank you”—or at the very least, acknowledge the others in the room.

Nothing derails holiday fun faster than demanding your child say “Thank you” to Auntie dear for footie pajamas, only for them to erupt into a stream of whining excuses about how hot those PJs make their feet.

Give yourself an early gift this year: take a few moments before the festivities begin for some simple holiday social skills practice. Setting clear behavioral expectations ahead of time helps everyone—big or small—know what to expect.

1. Practice Holiday Greetings

For the most part, saying hello is simple. However, given the excitement of the day, gentle reminders go a long way.

  • Roleplay entering the room: Practice walking through the front door and saying “Hi” together.

  • Eye contact alternatives: If direct eye contact is challenging, coach your loved one to look at the person’s chin or forehead instead.

  • Non-verbal greetings: Practice waving, using the ASL sign for “Hi,” or sharing a simple smile.

  • Set clear boundaries: Spell out unexpected behaviors clearly ahead of time (e.g., hiding behind adults or running straight under the table).

2. Offer Alternatives to Hugs and Handshakes

For some children, physical touch can feel overwhelming. Provide your child with comfortable alternatives to hugging:

  • Fist bumps

  • High fives

  • A friendly wave

Pro-Tip for Relatives: If you have family members who might feel hurt without a traditional hug, reach out before the gathering. Briefly explain why physical boundaries are important for your child and tell them how they can support you.

3. Prepare for Gift-Opening Disappointment

Disappointment when opening gifts isn’t unusual, but practicing reactions in advance makes a world of difference:

  • Practice with silly items: Wrap up everyday items like spoons, rocks, or paper towels. Practice unwrapping them, smiling, and saying “Thank you!”

  • Create a secret signal: Make a plan for duplicate gifts. Channel your inner baseball coach and establish a subtle gesture (like tapping your shoulder) that communicates: “I know you already have this. We will exchange it later—just smile and say thank you for now.”

Social Skills Practice Makes Permanent

In all of these scenarios, remember: practice doesn’t make perfect—practice makes permanent.

Through it all, whether behaviors go as expected or not, try to find the joy. Find something to laugh about, and cherish those small moments that fill your heart.

Happiest of Holidays!

Yours in Speech,

Lakeshore Speech Therapy, LLC

Programs Available Starting January 2019

snowman

Lakeshore Speech Therapy is as busy as the North Pole this time of year! We are excited to share upcoming programs starting in January.

Teen Social Skills Group: This social skills group is designed specifically for teens. The purpose of our group is to practice expanding and building social skills in the areas of communication, problem solving, social media, friendship, fitting in, empathy and leadership skills.

And

Assistive Technology for Executive Functioning: High School students can drop in for an hour session on how to use assistive technology to increase organization, work completion, and ultimately independence. Skills necessary for college and the workplace.

Please click on the links above for more information about both of these great opportunities.

Yours in Speech,

Lakeshore Speech Therapy, LLC.

Holiday Prep – Make the Holidays Memoriable – Part I

AAC and Communication Tips for a wonderful Thanksviging

Preparing Loved Ones for the Holidays is the Best Gift of all!

The weather reminds us the season of Holidays is at hand. Cooler days and nights, leaves and snowflakes falling.

While your are prepping your house for the Holidays, don’t forget to prep your friends and family as well. Earlier this year, we suggested ideas for making your loved one’s time celebrating the 4th of July more enjoyable. Now is the perfect time to begin preparing for you and your family to create an environment during these Holidays that supports your loved one as much as possible.

Location of celebration.

While your family may have always celebrated the Holidays at Aunt Millie’s house, is it really the best place? Does Aunt Millie’s house have enough room so your loved one can comfortably participate in the festivities? Does Aunt Millie’s house have a place where your loved one might be able to ‘escape’ the whirl of activity? You may need to suggest a different venue for the Holiday celebration, a venue that better supports your loved one. If a venue change is not possible, you may need to suggest or abridge the time you spend at Aunt Millie’s to a time frame that better supports your loved one.

Time of celebrate.

Is there a law stating all Holidays must be celebrated at dinner time? This year you may need to suggest a different time of day to celebrate the Holidays, a time of day when your loved one is at her/his best. Holiday brunch? Holiday lunch? Holiday snack time? You know your loved better than anyone. When she/he is at their best, YOU are able to relax and enjoy the festivities as well.

Timing of events.

Is the best part of the celebration held for later in the day or evening? Can the highlight of the day be the first thing that happens? Relieving the anticipation of the highlight will decrease unexpected behaviors, which better supports your loved one.

This is not a finite list of considerations.  These are examples to get you thinking of the best plan for you and your family. These are examples to begin your prepping for the Holidays to best support your loved one so ultimately everyone can enjoy being together for the Holidays.

 

Yours in Speech,

Lakeshore Speech Therapy, LLC.

Press Pause

pause button

The clock is beginning to tick….loudly!  Time to pack up the Halloween decorations and get ready for the mad dash of the Holiday season!  There is no escaping the hustle and bustle of the Seasons.

Typically, we share information to help to improve a loved ones communication or self-regulation; this week we are focused on Y.O.U. – the caregiver, the superperson, the parent, the great juggler of all! Why would we spend a week thinking about YOU?  The answer is simple….YOU are just as important and need to be cared for as much as everyone else in your world.

Take 5 more minutes after you read this blog to focus on the person that keeps all the gears of your family’s life running smoothly – YOU!  We realize this is easier said than done. Let’s get to work before your 5 minutes is up!

Where do/can you find a quiet moment? At the grocery store? At line at the bank? On break at work? Sitting in the waiting room at Lakeshore Speech? When we say a moment, we mean it.  We aren’t talking about a 2 hour massage (while that is a great thing in itself) or a 1 hour meditation session. We are talking 5-10 minutes. Don’t brush this step off, think about it, really think about it.

What helps calm you? What re-centers you? What makes you smile? Does listening to a certain song bring a smile to your face? Does looking at pictures of vacation lower your blood pressure? You know immediately what brings you calm. Keep those items close at hand, especially during the busy days ahead.

Now put it all together on your schedule – DAILY.  Reserve those moments for yourself. Make an appointment with yourself every day….. every day! Use your time not to plan for what will happen later or what you have to purchase or what you need to wrap, but to calm and rejuvenate yourself.  

Those few moments may make the difference in creating a less stressful, more joyous Holiday Season.

Yours in Speech,

Lakeshore Speech Therapy, LLC.

Halloween Ready!

Halloween trick or treat

You used your parental superpowers to navigate the full moon last week, and you will use those powers again this week, especially on Wednesday, October 31st.  Check your list: comfortable costume – done; communication method – done; prep for the big night – read on.

Halloween evening is filled with anticipated wonder.  This anticipation can lead to anxiety which can cause unexpected behaviors.  Preparing your loved one in advance may eliminate or diminish the anxiety.  These proactive techniques are not difficulty, expensive or complex.  

Communicating to your child about what they can expect on Halloween evening can make a significant difference.  This communication can look like a bedtime story – “Once upon a time, a little girl/boy was excited for Halloween. Her/His name was (your child’s name). Child’s name was going to be dressed as a (your child’s costume).  On Halloween day, she/he went to school and had a great day.  When child’s name got home from school she/he made sure her/his homework was done. Child’s name and her/his family had dinner. After child’s name ate her/his dinner she/he changed into her/his costume. Etc…..”

This communication can look like a picture book.  Draw basic stick figures to represent the expected activities o Halloween.  Please feel free to utilize these sequence pictures as well. trickortreatsequence.png

This communication can look like a social story.  We have provided a social story about Halloween for you. Social stories are more effective when read frequently.  While this is coming to you a few days before Halloween, reading the story two to three times prior to the event can decrease anxiety as well as increase success. halloween-social-story

Remember to breathe and enjoy the moment…… these moments go by too quickly.

Yours in Speech,

Lakeshore Speech Therapy, LLC

Trick or Treat!

trick or treat

Trick or Treat!  The three most important words in October! When a child experiences a language deficit, creating an environment where there is no pressure of saying ‘Trick or Treat’ is by far the most important part of Halloween!

While practicing saying those magical words is one way to prepare for the big night, there are other options that might be considered.  

Make the words “Trick or Treat” part of the child’s costume. If your child is:

  • a superhero: make a ‘speech bubble’ with the words “Trick or Treat” (like in the cartoons) and attached it to the child’s costume.
  • a cowgirl or cowboy: attach a sign that says “Trick or Treat” on the hat or lasso
  • a robot: make “Trick or Treat” part of the ‘read-out tape’ or monitor (on the child’s tummy) of the robot

Print the words on the palm of white gloves and not only are your child’s hands toasty but they can effectively communicate.

These examples are just the start of the imaginative ways you can design to help a child with a language deficit focus less on the stress of ‘talking on the spot’ and more on effectively communicating.  

Yours in Speech,

Lakeshore Speech Therapy, LLC

Costume Time of the Year : Preparing for Halloween

Dressed up for Halloween

Halloween is just a few days away!  The night of candy collection! Whatever will your child wear?  How many times will that choice change? If your children are anything like the majority of the universe, she/he will have a definite idea of what they would like to be and then about 23 hours before the big night – change their mind!  Hopefully this will NOT be the case for your and your world this year!

Choosing a Halloween costume, while exciting, can create a completely different set of stressors one might not typically consider.  While being able to see clearly as well as being seen clearly is of utmost importance, there are more significant issues as well adjustments that need to be made for choosing a costume if your child experiences any sensory issues.

Masks – they are fun for some and not so fun for others.  When a mask might be part of the costume, have your child wear it around the house prior to the ‘big night’.  All children will tell you they LOVE the mask while in the store but when faced with having to wear it longer than 2 minutes, they are unable to manage.  Consider a soft version to a hard mask or even a half-mask. Using make-up vs a mask might really make a difference. Really look at the costume –  is covering the child’s face necessary?

Hats or headbands – here too are lovely items that make sense for some but will ruin an evening for others.  Similar to a mask, have your child wear it around the house for longer than 2 minutes. Initially you may have to start at 2 min and work his/her tolerance up to 15-20 minutes.  Consider a softer version and/or if it HAS to be part of the ‘look’.

Major clothing part of the costume  – tags, buttons, velcro, and zippers are scarier to some children than goblins and monsters! You might consider taking a page from your mother’s or grandmother’s handbook – make your own costume. Please do not think for one moment we are talking about getting the sewing machine out or whip stitching something together!  Consider the following ideas using the clothes that are hanging in the closet now:

Jeans and a flannel shirt:

  • Adding a tool box or tool belt = construction worker, carpenter, Paw Patrol character
  • Adding a piece of fake wood (ie: cardboard tube) = lumberjack or jane

Leggings and a long shirt:

  • Adding a cape on the shirt = superhero
  • Adding a belt with a few fake flowers on it = fairy

Jeans and a white t-shirt:

  • Adding maybe a scarf around the neck = ‘50’s girl
  • Rolling up the sleeves = ‘50’s guy

Shirt and bottoms that are the same color =

  • Tape a white ‘M’ on the shirt = M&M character
  • Tape a picture of any character from the movie “Inside Out” on the shirt

Look at the PJs your child currently wears – chances are those worn to school or to a party could pass as a costume without issue.

By now, your costume creator self has probably more than enough ideas for this Halloween. Feel free to share pictures of your costume creations with vkotansky@lakeshorespeech.com and we’ll post them on our Facebook page.  Your photo might be the inspiration which makes a difference in the life of a little one this year or for years to come.

Happy Halloween Prep!  And above else, remember to enjoy the time with your child making memories that will last a lifetime!

Yours in Speech,

Lakeshore Speech Therapy, LLC